Writing Homework Help

Assignment 7: The Best and Worst Things to Say

The purpose of this assignment is for you to consider some of the best and worst things you could say to someone who has clinical depression (or really, any mental illness).

This assignment is worth a total of 10 points. If you do not post your own response to this assignment any day before 11:59 p.m. on Sunday, 10/13, SIX points will be deducted from your total. In addition, if you do not meaningfully reply to at least two other students any day before 11:59 p.m. on Sunday, 10/13, TWO points will be deducted from your total for each missing reply. After you have completed all the components of this assignment, I will grade the assignment and post your score (along with some comments) in the course’s online gradebook. I will not accept late posts!

1) Go to the websites: Best Things to Say to Someone who is Depressed

and Worst Things to Say to Someone who is Depressed

and look through the lists of both the best and the worst things to say to someone with depression (or really, any mental illness).

2) After you’ve read through all of the Best/Worst statements, post your own response to the following questions to the Best and Worst Things discussion board forum:

A) Given the choices on the “Best Things to Say” list, in your opinion, what is the ONE best thing you could say to someone with depression? Explain why you picked it from the list in the article (3 points).

B) Given the choices on the “Worst Things to Say” list, in your opinion, what is the ONE worst thing you could say to someone with depression? Explain why you picked it from the list in the article (3 points).

3) Read and meaningfully reply to at least two other students’ posts. (4 points)

first student:

In my opinion, I believe the best thing to say to someone with depression is you are important to me! I choose this one from the list because i feel like that is all you need to hear some days. I feel if some people knew how important they are to certain people, it might make them feel worthy of life.

In the list, I believe the worst thing to say to someone with depression is you’re just looking for attention. I choose this one from the list because no one deserves to hear those words when you are not in the right state of mind. Depression is sometimes very difficult to express and when it is express who wants to hear that it was all for attention. Depression is a very touchy subject and should be respected.

second student:

Depression comments

After visiting many sites that offered positive and negative things to say to a depressed person, the same comments were repeated often. The web site…“Healthy Places”…offered 100 positive and 23 negative comments. There is no singular “cookie cutter” comment anyone can use. Each person who is beyond sad…ie..depressed…has unique individual circumstances that leads them to this lonely place, and they then have unique avenues and triggers to escape the depression they are caught in. Some of the examples listed on the web sites were neutral, some were seemingly helpful, and others were …it‘s better to say nothing than to say THAT“.‘.

Depression is a very complex illness. It may have a basis in a biological, social, psychological, or genetic beginning or source. Imaging that a friend would approach me and offer verbal support, there were only several statements that I would find helpful and supportive. Most sounded patronizing, superior, or unconcerned. It is all unique to the individual. Some people might desire a non-judgmental ear, or an honest “mirror” of the situation. Others may want a group of friends around, or maybe just one trusted friend. Some want to be left alone, and others need constant contact. How deep is the depression / mental illness ? How long has it been going on? What happened and who else knows? Might even a kind thing to say be a trigger into a deeper state of depression? Age, gender, educational level, income level, strength of will and strength of self all make for a very complex problem, needed an appropriate method of assistance.

Best Things to Say.
From “Psych Central”…“I’m here if you want to…/talk, golf, walk, drive around, go to a movie, etc“.
The activity chosen in your offering is customized to the person and the relationship you share, so that it is within the comfort zone of each person and is nothing too unusual as to draw false conclusions about the true meaning behind the offering. This type of comment / offering leaves the option open to the depressed person and let’s them decide / empower the situation as to their desires and mental state and timetable. Accept or reject. At least you have articulated your friendship and concern and the desire to move the depressed person out of their suffering and lonely mental state.
There must be a feeling of great comfort that there is at least one concerned individual that knows of a persons depressed state and is willing to assist as and when needed is a great safety net to have. No sense in restating the obvious about a depressed state of mind. Be open, caring, committed and neutral.

Worst Things to Say.
From Healthy Places…”What’s your problem ?”.
This curt, unthoughtful, unemotional, complaining, condescending, superior, accusatory and open-ended statement would send anyone deeper into depression. That statement says…”I don’t care about you, your mental state bothers me, stay away from me, you are mentally deficient, you have severe problems, I am better than you, act normal, get over it, how abnormal are you, explain yourself”. That particular statement is used by some people within relationships, used by some parents towards their children, used at work places, actually, it is used everywhere. It is a hurtful statement and is used specifically to shock and demean another person.
The weakened mental state of a depressed person does not need further damaging sources of self image and self esteem destruction. Perhaps the person offering a statement of acknowledgement intends to be helpful, but what one person deems helpful, another person may find it hurtful. The old saying…”if you have nothing good to say, then don’t say anything” holds true in this case.